you never know.

sunlight filters through the trees. the breezes rustle the leaves in a rythmn that closely mimics the sound of the ocean waves. a north west Arkansas rain has left this green forest smelling fresh & crisp. & here we are alive. upon our trusty steads we ride. soon the smell of leather mixes with sweaty horse. the smell hits my nostrils & fills my happy cup. it is may twenty-fourth. 4 authorities. 4 ranchers & 1 visitor wind their way upon the nine mile trail that holds the name little clifty creek. there is so much nature to see. a little deer leaps away at the bottom of a small ravine & my mind is reminded of a children's book picture. i think of how people long for experiences like this & here i am in it. i smile. it is good to be alive. halfway down the trail i am reminded of the power of our horses. in a moment mr. doug goes from in the saddle to nearly smushed by his young horse tio. something has become too much for tio. he rears. & instead of landing back on his four feet he decides to just lay down on his back. its just mr. doug & i at the tail of the group everyone is ahead. i don't remember dismounting but there i am reaching for tios reins while holding on to my own steed. & mr. doug just lays. ok it felt like an eternity however i realize that it was just a short few minutes. i started breathing again once he began to move & stand up. & just like that we continue on. like nothing happened. except something D I D happen. i said my thankful prayers as we rode on. & God's creation continued to display beauty for us to see. like tiny daisy's growing in unlikely places & long lizards basking on trees. . . 

the day is may twenty fifth. i have drove away from the ranch for the afternoon. i find myself meandering through target picking up things that had sat on my list for much to long. a few other stops & then i spend a while just driving through the town of rogers. everything has become so green. there are roads that will lead you to giant houses set behind gates & fences. & roads that lead you beside the lower class trailer houses that just scream arkansas. i wonder what stories those houses would tell. back to the ranch. the hour is 00:45 :) . all phones loudly announce that we are under a tornado warning. ms. sam & i look at each other, she is peering down from her home on the top bunk to my home below. our phone light illuminating our faces gives this moment a bit of an extra spook. lightning flashes in a very steady rythmn. thunder crashes. should we be worried? a message is sent to mr. doug. we both sit on the floor now studying the radar maps trying to figure out where this storm is. mr. doug calls. 1:00. " i am watching & all seems to be ok." suddenly the phones loudly announce that at this time a tornado is on the ground. " ya you should probably go to the shelter." so remaining calm in appearance i shut off our house alarm system. ms. sam goes & collects our two ranchers upstairs & myself the two here on the main floor. you try to make sure you voice doesn't shake. you pray. " girls. grab your blankets & come we need to go to the storm shelter." the reactions were interesting. . . the front door is opened. the air is heavy. humid. not one sound can be heard. not what i expected. it almost feels suffocating. the front door is sucked shut. halfway there the walk turns to a run. the atmosphere just freaked me out. we sit in our damp storm shelter. in a little circle with our blankets wrapped snuggly around. i pray.   "protect those in the path." how did a B.C girl end up in a storm shelter in north west arkansas ? how did two youth girls get trusted with the lives of 4 young girls? that responsibilty sits heavier then usual as we sat there. 35 ish minutes pass. we go back to the house as everything is showing the storm has moved passed us. hugs are given & the girls are sent back to bed. ms. sam & i sit watching live weather channels. we watch as the "super cell " moves over the town of Rogers. we watch it continue on its way. pictures start appearing. a funnel picture taken from a very familiar road name just a tiny bit north of us. a few comments filter into the live feed i live in this area. i have no roof now.  i think to myself. this is  B A D . we wake up after minimal sleep. the first thing i do is check the phone & hit the news feeds. what i see just makes me want to cry. surely the pictures are worse than the real thing. it's the opposite. after driving around it is clear. seeing it in real life is way worse than the pictures could ever translate. 

i feel so helpess here in my warm bed. my house with electricty. while 6 minutes away a house sits with no roof. while children walk with their parents through the rubble & pick up the few precious items they can save & place them in a plastic walmart bag. it feels so wrong to just keep on living life as if nothing happened. i know that life must go on but my heart hurts for these people. i see families clearing trees off of their roof & see chicken barns ripped apart. i see trees that no longer hold their beauty & splendor but have been twisted & snapped into the strangest angles. i see buildings ripped apart on the street i drove down just a short 8 hours ago. 

& you hear people saying God is good. & it is true. even in this chaos He is still good He is still there by our side. He is still guiding. i am reminded that even though bad things happen He is not withholding His love from us. perhaps it is through the experience of pain & disaster we are able to better see His love for us. 

God has been with us here. 

please continue to pray. pray for us here at the ranch & please add the people of north west arkansas that experienced loss in this storm. 

till next time 

miss tif.